16- Xerondar

Forty-seven minutes past midnight, the twelfth of September. Seven pounds, two ounces. Ten fingers, ten toes, and a healthy sounding cry. The most beautiful sound in the universe, at least to Xerondar’s ears. She was born with a thick head of wispy dark hair and delicate pink skin. The doctor had been surprised to find four teeth already in her mouth, and she began to open her intelligent-looking blue-gray eyes just twenty-one hours after her birth. She was perfect.

Modern hospitals have a special room where they keep the newborn babies. This one had a large window where friends and relatives could look in and see them. Xerondar stood outside that window almost constantly. He watched over her as she slept and cried and had her diaper changed. Every few hours they took her to see her "mother", the carrier, and that was when he would eat, walk around, talk to the staff.

Her birth was healthy and uncomplicated, so she would be leaving the hospital in a few days, when the carrier was fully recovered. Then he would not be seeing very much of her, not for some time. All he could do for now was to treasure these few short days when he could stare for hours at her tiny face.

The carrier’s husband was also frequently found at this window, which made Xerondar feel slightly uncomfortable. He watched the man as he grinned proudly at her, as if she belonged to him. This was the man that Nira would think of as her father for the next several years. Xerondar always felt a little jealous of the fathers for some reason. This plump, balding man would hold her in his arms, kiss her baby face, make her laugh, teach her to walk and talk and tie her shoes. He would earn her love and trust before Xerondar could even be permitted to introduce himself to her.

But he had loved her first. Long before this man had even been born, Xerondar had been there to love her, to care for her and shelter her, to protect her and teach her and serve her. And he would continue to serve her, even after this man’s life had faded from all memory.

He turned back to where she lay sleeping. They called her Caroline. A nice enough name, as many of her childhood names had been. Xerondar longed for the day when he could remind her of her true name. He whispered it to her through the glass. "Dellanira."

After several hours, a nurse touched him on the shoulder. Visiting hours were over for the day. Sighing, he glanced at her one more time, then made his way to the elevator. He had a room at a hotel just a block away from the hospital, so that he could be there constantly whenever visitors were permitted. It wasn’t until he stepped outside that he realized how hungry he was. He had only eaten small snacks during the brief periods when Nira was taken out of the viewing room, anxious not to waste any time when they might bring her back at any moment. He placed a hand on his empty stomach and glanced around. There was a Tex-Mex restaurant between here and the hotel that was open 24-hours. Xerondar had gone there the night before and had the best puffy tacos he had ever tasted. Or maybe they had just tasted that way to him. Everything in this world seemed a thousand times better, now that she was born, now that he had finally been able to see her face after all this time.

He entered the restaurant and was seated at a small table. A pretty young waitress appeared with a basket of warm tortilla chips and a bowl of fresh salsa. "Are you expecting friends, or is it just going to be you tonight?" she asked.

"No, I’m alone," he replied. He thought about that as she took away the extra place setting on the table and left to fetch him a Dr. Pepper. It would be nice if he had someone to share this with, someone who understood all of this, whom he could talk about it with. He wondered what it was like for the others, those who had maintained connections with each other.

He remembered the years that he and Nira had spent with Aterat and Tsu Lai, before Nira had decided to break away from them. No, even back then there hadn’t been much friendship between them. Tsu Lai had been nice enough, and Xerondar had gotten along with him fairly well. But Tsu Lai wasn’t a very social person. He was always so quiet, with that far-off look in his eyes, as if he were contemplating the universe or something, which made for a lot of rather awkward, one-sided conversations. And Aterat . . . well, she had always hated Xerondar, and only tolerated him because he was necessary for Nira.

He’d heard that most of Shepetheleh’s followers were a pretty tight-knit group. Some of them even lived together. When they had first set out on their own, Nira had briefly considered going to him, but she had decided against it, choosing instead to be independent and neutral. Xerondar respected her decision, and even agreed with it. But he did sometimes wish that there were more independents like them, others that he could perhaps keep in contact with. He’d like to be able to call one of them now, and share his excitement over Nira’s birth.

Of course, he and Nira weren’t the only pair that was on their own– there were a few others that had also decided to choose independence and neutrality over the constant fighting. There was Finbar, but his situation was just too depressing. It just wouldn’t feel right for Xerondar to talk to him about how happy he was, when that man’s own life held such little joy. Nadina was another independent, but no way in hell would he ever want anything to do with M’boku and his sick games, and to get involved with Nadina would be to get involved with M’boku. Then there was Alexei, but Xerondar really didn’t know him very well, and from what he’d seen of him, he wasn’t sure he wanted to.

And so here he was, sitting in a restaurant alone, eating his puffy taco in silence, and keeping his excitement to himself. In just a few short years, he wouldn’t be alone anymore. He would have Nira with him. After all this time, they would finally be together again. He could hardly wait.